Maternal Paranoia.

I had a whole lot of shopping to do for Govinda’s today, including picking up a bulk order of vital wheat gluten in Arvada. I forgot to take my car charger, so my phone died half way through my errands.

When I arrived home, I discovered cornbread over-baking in the oven, the timer repeatedly blaring. I called out for Brahma and Yom, but there was no answer. That’s when I noticed a spill on the floor by the tall stepping stool that Yom has previously fallen from twice before.

Instantly, my mind painted a vivid scenario in which my baby fell on the concrete floor, spilling the liquid, and was hurt so badly that Brahma rushed off to the hospital, forgetting the baking bread and ignoring the puddle. This suddenly explained the knocked-over trash can I’d noticed in the alleyway as I parked! I turned off the oven, removed the cornbread, plugged in my phone, and frantically started calling Brahma through my laptop. No answer.

We share the car, and so he would have needed an emergency ride. I called the people that he might have turned to. No answer! I ran to the nearest neighbors who would have been good choices for rides, and knocked on their doors – NO ANSWER!

I invested my energy in remaining as calm as possible, though my mind flashed to how empty life would be without that sweet little boy. As soon as I was able to turn on my phone, I dialed Brahma over and over, but was unable to reach him.

Though it was only about fifteen minutes, it felt like each one dragged by. I finally made contact with the help of a friend, and by then I was choking back tears and shaking, partly due to hunger, as it was the afternoon, and I hadn’t eaten yet.

As it turns out, they’d gone over to Govinda’s to surprise me with completing the cleaning job I was supposed to do when I got back. The noisy dishwasher masked the ringing of the phone, and by the time my friend called him, Brahma was on his way back for the cornbread he’d accidentally spaced out in the oven. He felt terrible about worrying me, but I was just happy to find that they were both okay.

It’s moments like these in which I realize just how attached I am to that little critter of mine.

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